20th Mar 2008, by Andrew Barr

10 Yetis are hardworking, never-ill Public Relations Professionals, thankyou very much.

Sick days (for the uninitiated jobsworths, days where you perhaps cough once or twice as you lazily sit down all day, whilst playing the PlayStation or messing around on the PC, but are really 'too ill' to go into work and... sit at a computer) could be a thing of the past if Dame Carol Black, national director for health and work has anything to do with it.

Reports suggest that ill-health costs the UK economy £103bn annually - the same as the cost of running the NHS for a whole year.

Dame Carol suggests that instead of sick notes, employees should provide 'well', or 'fit' notes, which would be a list of the things that said faker/ill person can actually do at work, alongside whingeing about their cold.

Apparently, GP provided sick notes given to those with 'short-term health problems' contribute to many patients 'drifting' into claiming incapacity benefits, which accounts for £63bn of the above stated figure.


That's it. I must be too ill to go on with my life... I sneezed.

Funnily enough though, as much as I'm ridiculing others for playing on minor complaints, I recently consulted NHSDirect online about a really sore throat I had (I was convinced that funeral arrangements should probably be initiated), only to be given the patronising, yet comically blunt answer 'you have a common cold'.

My girlfriend hasn't let me forget it, and referred to it as a case in point of the modernly dubbed 'man-flu'.

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